When you wonder why your taxes are so high make sure not to blame the liberal agenda. We weren’t the ones guaranteeing lawsuits by using “under god” in the pledge. No, that was a red scare driven conservative scheme. We also didn’t elect to use the death penalty which costs millions more in pleas than life in prison. I could go on with other examples of brainless conservative policies such as military spending (funny troupes don’t seem to be happier now than when Clinton was in office) but let’s leave that to another post.

There’s three reasons to be a Republican; greed, Jesus, or ignorance. The fact that the center reason doesn’t get along with the wings is just more proof that in most cases the latter is true. Let’s just come clean here, conservatives are of a selfish mindset. They care only about they’re bank book but don’t seem to realize this book is stimulated by fairly liberal policies. Here’s an example: Joey Greed moves out of a middle-class area because taxes are going up and blacks are moving in next door. He doesn’t move too far, just a few miles north to a suburb. This new place is exactly like his old one but the taxes are slightly cheaper, and best yet, there’s no blacks. Mr. Greed occasionally drives through the old place and notices quite a few abandoned homes, graffiti, liquor stores, etc… He also notices the once primarily white neighborhood is now entirely black. Things are obvious to Mr. Greed. This once beautiful neighborhood has succumbed to the dreaded minority disease: “Those people don’t care about they’re neighborhood!”

What Mr. Greed fails to realize is that he didn’t “care about HIS neighborhood.” If he did, he wouldn’t have sprawled out leaving behind a significantly lower population with a significantly lower medium income and subsequently raising taxes. Now Mr. Greed’s car occasional gets broken into, and once in a while he spots a “bum” stumbling out of the southern ghetto. He’s thinking of moving again because the people in his neighborhood are talking of a tax hike to pay for improvements in crime prevention. Mr. Greed doesn’t like sharing. He doesn’t think “those” people deserve his hard earned dollar. Yet, Mr. Greed loves Jesus. He’s even got a fish.

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